Monday, November 14, 2011

Awkward Moments: Doors Are Complex

I had a ridiculous moment this morning. I work on the second floor of a six story building. The elevator section of our floor has a balcony and overlooks one of the first floor entrances. As I was walking across the balcony, from one door to another, a woman who looked to be late 20ish walked in the entrance below. I gave her a quick glance of curiosity and that was it. It wasn't any sort of stare, despite her being cute, because staring is creepy. But at the instant I looked her way, she looked up and we locked eyes and she no doubt thought I'd been ogling her the entire time.

At that moment I reached the other door and went to open it and somehow failed to succeed. Rarely daunted by failure, I tried again, pulling mightily this time, but to no avail. Then I realized the problem; I wasn't turning the doorknob.

To be fair, the opposite door I'd just come from, while the exact same design, doesn't have to be turned and you just pull on it and in you go. I'm going to pretend I was still in that mindset and not that I just couldn't figure out how to work a door.

Regardless, I'm sure all she saw was some dude staring at her and then being defeated by a door. I decided I had to play it off to save a little of my rapidly depleting dignity, so I KNOCKED on the door. I will point out that this leads to a hallway and there's no one around to hear a knock. But the girl below did not have any clue that this was the case, so I knocked. And I knocked again. I waited until she was JUST out of my line of sight before I opened the door, and then said aloud, "thank you!" so she'd think someone had opened the door for me and I was politely thanking them for it.

Who knows, maybe I made her day because she thinks she was looking so good today that she caused a random guy to stare and forget how to turn a knob.

13 comments:

Anne H, said...

Since we are ok... This is hilarious! Nice and vivid, I felt like I was watching it happen :)

Nick said...

I wish no one else had watched it happen =p

Anne H. said...

Maybe you'll walk in tomorrow to see her banging on that door! ;)

Nick said...

Then she'll see that there's no way anyone would have heard my knock and that I'm completely full of it.

Anne H. said...

you have two options here....

1.) *tisk* and sarcastically say "Um, try turning the handle" and then make some sort of *pscht* noise while you shake your head at her...and walk away.

-funny, yet, not smooth.

2.) walk up nice and close and in a low (but not Sling Blade low) voice say "oh, they just fixed this yesterday, let me get that for you"

-way smooth!

Nick said...

I have to assume a normal person would turn the handle first and thus I'd never get a chance to do any of this.
What's the third option?

Anne H. said...

get her fired. -clearly the only rational way to handle this

Nick said...

I don't know if she actually works in our building. My guess is she was a visitor.

But if she does, she's TOTALLY fired.

Anne H. said...

It's done then. :)

nite, bird. It's way past my bed time.

Nick said...

Night night, Loba.

Nick said...

It's great to hear from you, by the by.

Anne H. said...

Nice to banter with you again.

Nick said...

It's been rather a while.